already another one of those days

Haven't even gone to work yet, but it is already another one of those days. The poor old dog has diarrhea once again (three times last week, first time for this one).

I am beginning to think that extreme old age is like pregnancy - the physical discomforts get you ready for the next stage. In the case of pregnancy, it is the horrible pain of labor and then a wonderful baby. In the case of extreme old age, it would be the mystery and journey of death. But when every moment of every day is spent in discomfort, after awhile you are ready to move on.

I know that the dog cannot help it - if he were human he would probably be well up into his nineties. After all, he is a Labrador retriever who is over fourteen years old now. But the daily grind that the last few months have become - the daily cleaning up of multiple accidents of both pee and poop - the constant stench and mess of it. Not being able to go on a vacation, or leave the house without at least one human present for more than an hour or two...it is just really starting to get to me. And no matter how much I scrub the floor, the house still smells. Bill has promised me that he will rent a power washer and clean the floors really well for me once the dog passes, as well as hauling every inch of carpeting to the dump, and I only hope that even something that extreme will work.

Listen to me. I am just so worn down now...both physically and emotionally.

Doesn't help that it is Sept. 11 - and like most Americans, I think I will feel sad on this date every year for the rest of my life.