thank you Mr. Harwell

How I love this old man. Ernie Harwell, with his class, generosity, humility, and kindness exemplifies what is best about all humanity. God bless you and keep you Ernie. We love you!

brief update

I have not posted here in a while; primarily because I have been so stressed out and exhausted due to my job.

Dan and the kids are doing well, though. School starts next week for the kids, and Steven has been in soccer season for a couple of weeks now, even though school has not started yet.

having been trying to relax

Work is always in such a horrible stressful uproar these days, it has been hard to relax.

I have been trying to watch movies when I wake up in the morning to keep from brooding and feeling bad about work. Yesterday it was Paul Blart, Mall Cop, today it was The Other Boleyn Girl, which was gorgeously filmed, but even more flawed in its history than the book it was based upon. Not sure what it will be tomorrow - perhaps Kung Fu Panda or that musical based on Abba tunes whose title escapes me at the moment.

I hate my job.

talking vacation

We spent nine wonderful days at Muskegon State park, camping out on top of a towering sand dune on the Lake Michigan shore, with a stair case down to miles of private beach. It was too cold to go into the water- the water itself was cold due to it being such a cool summer, and the day time highs were only in the sixties some days when we were there - but ti was still peaceful and beautiful.

It rained two nights and one day while we were there.

Dan and I drove up the coast to Pentwater, Luddington, and Manistee one day, stopping off at farm stands for fresh cherries and blueberries and eating lunch at an outdoor cafe in Pentwater.

Another day we drove down the coast to Grand Haven, and enjoyed lunch there near the beach. The beach was set up for the US Open for beach volleyball, but no one was out because it was raining, cold, and windy.

We cooked over the fire a lot, and had s'mores nearly every night, to the delight of the kids.

One of the cats (Bud) had the time of his life and the other (Matty) hid under blankets in the camper for most of the trip, earning the new nickname of Lumpy - as in lump under the blankets.

It was a wonderful and relaxing time, and I was very sorry to come home and have to go back to stressful nasty work.

I have woken up twice since coming back in the middle of the night, dreaming of being in the camper, and wondering where I am, while lying there in my own bed at home.

On Thursday I had a sick day from work as I went to the endocrinologist in the afternoon. Given the never ending fatigue, it was no surprise that they increased the synthroid dose again.

I hate my job. I hate it so much. After more than twenty years there, I have finally reached my limit on how much crappiness I can stand to take. Given the economy in Michigan right now, though, I have little choice in staying or going.

holy crap

Going from camping on Lake Michigan to that bottomless pit of despair called work tonight was like going from heaven to hell in less than 24 hours. Pray for me and my co-workers - we need it.

vacation at last

About to leave for a camping trip on lake Michigan for the next week. It will be a blessing beyond words, with miles of sandy beach and plenty of relaxation.

and more work

Dan and Steven spent Sunday out of the house, working for money, while Bill and I stayed home and just worked.

We popped up the camper and scrubbed it down on both the interior and exterior. It has not been used for nearly three years - we could not take vacations between me being so sick and the poor elderly dog being so feeble and incontinent - and man, did it ever smell musty and bad. We left it popped up overnight, and will leave it popped up to continue to air out until we leave on Friday or it rains, whichever comes first.

We also spent hours weeding the garden and the flower beds.

We got a lot done over the weekend!

I also kept getting so tired that each day I basiclly collapsed from exhaustion each afternoon and slept for at least a couple of hours. And at bedtime on Saturday night I was so tired I was literally staggering around the house as if I was drunk and couldn;t think straight. This worries me, as it indicates that my synthroid dose is still not right.

I drank the radiation in January - and while I do feel better - it is a relief not to be shaking from anxiety, having heart palpitations, and having daily diarrhea from the hyperthyroidism - I am not feeling as good as I had hoped I would at this point in my treatment, and I am still showing signs of hypothyroidism.

I keep reminding myself that it took them years to correctly diagnose the problem, and those were years when I got completely worn out physically - and that it might take me more than a few months to really start to feel better.